Limericks - Twisted to Convenience

Limericks are basically five-line poems originally from Ireland of the 18th century. While experts maintained that a true limerick, as a folk form is always obscene, there have been varied versions of this amusing form of literature. Also, apart from violation of taboo, limericks haven't really stuck to the standard five-line rule!

Following are a couple of my attempts at presenting a newer style of limericks. They come with an underlying theme, and not necessarily obscene, though folks can have them in good measure too!

-Met

"Book the ticket', said his pal, "book the ticket!"
Else, he feared, she would ceate a racket
Try as much he did, no ticket was on the book,
and all his pal did was cock a snook!
Alone, he started on Holmes, and found a new pal in the book!

-Solitude begets new friends, at times!


Sexy was Suzy, so bloody that none would get lazy
while on bed with Suzy!
Too hot to handle was she, with one hell of a puzzy.
The morning after, he realized that life was all but easy!

-Lust always doesn't do just!

No Divine Talk

Divinity is something humans love to behold, and not without reason. The very fact that there are things that make us realize their greatness in form and effect, and our own magnitude when juxtaposed with them, is reason enough to strike awe in us in general. While the majestic Himalayas leaves us humbled, the Sahara with its expanse has us breathless, and the Diamond makes us pale into insignificance. Here’s assuming the reader agrees that the earth forms mentioned above are inherently divine indeed.

In most of the old civilizations, including India’s, everything godly is considered divine. Rather, divinity is but synonymous with sacred things. This concept has defied ages and generations. And this is where one can experience the surge of all humanity to behold icons of religious legends. So much so that, faith gradually morphs into fervor, and people do whatever it takes to add in to the numbers. The author got more than a feeler of this phenomenon the past weekend, when he visited Tirumala and Tirupathi shrines, to get a glimpse of Lord Srinivasa who is the residing deity there. The Tirumala temple is situated on the top of the Seshachala Mountain, which is a culmination of Seven great hills. That this is the place where the Lord descended and set up his abode is stuff that beats every legend around. It’s no wonder then that the place is referred to as BhooVaikuntha or roughly, Heaven on Earth. Multitudes of people undertake an arduous climb up the hills; wait in serpentine queues for days together, chant Govinda! with gusto, all to get a glimpse of the bedecked Lord in peaceful poise. Not to forget the wads of currencies they drop in the Hundi as a token of gratitude and respect. He is said to be the boon-giver and a champion of peace & prosperity. There are people all over, in wait, in devotion, in hunger, in thirst, in tonsured heads, and in hope! Now this is what anyone would call the God rush*.

Oddly enough, though people did witness divine structures, ate divine food, read divine literature, there is a growing feeling that somewhere, men and women are making trips or paying visits quid pro quo. It is not essentially give and take, but more of promissory resolutions to keep in the instance of wishes coming true. While the statement by an anonymous author that ‘we have to pray with our eyes on God, not on the difficulties’ is not wholly justifiable here, a visit to a holy place could be worth all the while if there was more of marveling the nature, and the dazzling brilliance of the deity. And that’s where we feel that the thin line between religion and divinity is getting blurred. A bath in the Alakananda is sure to leave you numb and freezing, and you know you have met your match with nature. That’d make you say, “I bathed in the Holy waters”, and most probably warn others of extreme climatic conditions. But then, you’ve encountered divinity. The world probably hasn’t seen anything more perilous than a trip to the Moon. The folks who went up there saw it all. From a distance they could see Earth, in all its green and blue glory. But on the Moon, they saw death. Not a stone moved, not a whisper came! The silence was morbid. And that, as a creation of God, was divine. For it is a fact that human ascent always reaches new heights, but never really conquers nature! Divinity is something we only end up marveling at.

At the risk of sounding didactic, Nature is God’s creation. Stop. It’s not up for grabs, which is what blood-thirsty corporate are assuming. But it sure is lying there all to be discovered. And that doesn’t really need a divine intervention!

-Met

*New coinage. Not hitherto published

Not-too-Young, Free & Single

It takes a lot of convincing to let know that you’re better off single.

Living and working in your hometown, with your parents, is such a cool thing. Especially, if it’s a place like Bangalore, it can only get cooler! I’m trying to go beyond the obvious reasons - economic freedom and general security. This is not a bold and controversial statement I’ve proposed to make. And the previous two lines are not a blanket rule to every other individual around. Folks who are born and bred in Bangers typically would relate to my thoughts, a wee bit at least. And a chap who’s been to and done things at places that typically mark the essence of the cosmopolis the city is, wouldn’t disagree heavily either.

I don’t intend to write a eulogy on Bangalore, but I think it sounds good to set some very basic records straight. You see, Bangalore is not all about good software jobs & better pay cheques, multi-cuisine options and a great many places to booze. The city also serves to address needs somewhere higher up in Maslow’s famed hierarchy. I’ve seen social networking (not those internet sites, silly!) happening with such effortlessness that it’s just amazing to one’s mind. This of course, bearing in mind our labyrinthine social structure. Then you have languages. From vernacular Indian languages to French & German to Russian to Mandarin, options are aplenty. I picked languages, because they are the primary gateway to any culture worth its name. And then the numerous forums. For the book lovers, movie buffs, writers, quizzers, adventurers, motor bikers, lead guitarists, ikebana specialists and more, there are myriad avenues. Tai-chi, Jiujutsu, Kalari are just a few of the exotic martial arts taught here. To cut a long story short, the point is there’s so much to discover and enjoy in a city that carries a global image. The chap who went to and did things at the great places would surely not be an idler without a penny to part with. If you are someone who believes in following your heart and doing things dearer to it, you’ll see that the advantages of living with family are various and tangible.

For many, thoughts evolve as they get exposed to newer ideas. They don’t take things lying down, and would not mind challenging the most widely accepted theories. Perhaps an evolution to this extent may not have been possible a couple of decades earlier. People who didn’t think seriously about the way they wanted to direct their lives now have so much more meat in their thought.

Amorous relationships, unless they are equal to those of commitment, are not bound by rules of extreme patience and empathy. For, in an ‘evolved’ climate, everyone has in place, his or her own plans of carrying their lives. The idea of true love is reserved for ‘the ideal situation’, it appears. And for a commitment to happen, you need to know for sure what the other person’s scheme of things is. If that’s not to be, in the hustle and bustle of the big city, isn’t it pointless to go looking for love, with the apparent objective of tying the knot for the long term?

It’s not half as difficult putting such thoughts to paper, as it is trying to put across the same ideas while speaking with family and friends, face to face.

Really, it takes a lot of convincing to let know that you’re better off single!
-Met

About Time Too…

Its two months into the New Year now, and you can see people talking about the end of the first half already. A bloke who joined an organization around this time last year would say he’s almost a year and half old in the firm. It’s a good half of the year that you know you’re coming to the end of, in no time. And that, my friend, largely exemplifies the age old idiom, "time flies"!
It’s remarkable how psychology influences beliefs about efflux of time. We’d attended the wedding of this buddy of ours in the winter of 2007. And by last summer, he comes home bringing news that he’s a soon-to-be father. There has been no anticipation in the entire process of childbirth obviously, but the moment we heard him out, we were wondering if it was really nearing nine months since he tied the knot! While there was no doubt that we were not time warped, we were also convinced that here was a chap who made things happen, on the double! If this was something not everyone can relate to, bang-on, our beloved government’s hundredth day celebrations should be a better example. You have barely voted them into power, than they start their celebrations, ‘beautifying’ the city in the process. Banners, buntings, cut outs and what not. Of course, hundred days are up in fact, and we the people fail to watch them tick in the hustle and bustle of life.
There are many who aver that time goes by quick, as a function of an individual’s busyness. But hey, we do know people who are, err, great thinkers. Those who have points aplenty, to ponder over. Ask them if they are happy with the time they have with them, and they’d say “You think so? Barely have I started getting my ideas right than its noon!” A writer who “added a comma in the morning, and removed it by evening”, hardly has time to overcome his writer’s block!
Running a race against time, for 27 years now, I can safely bet that time takes a break, only in our mind. In our mind, when our wait for something gets unending. When all we want to see is tomorrow. It’s time’s way of saying “you’re yet to live the day today, my friend! What’s the hurry?” After all, everyday counts!

-Metafore

TROUBLE WITH RISK?

“If you don’t risk anything, you risk even more!” is a legendary quote by Erica Jong, the American author best known for Fear of Flying. It does really appear a pointless exercise to elaborate on what the line purports to convey. Because we are in such times that ideas as these are assumed necessarily, before embarking on anything. Without much ado, let us look at it from a different angle.
Endeavors fraught with risk are generally reckoned with awe and the result coveted by many. Fair enough, given that it is such a high feeling you get after having done something, which most others would chicken out of. So do we believe that all things that are potential deterrents of a given exercise are risks, characteristically? Risks are often debilitating in nature and sometimes act as known side-effects of a particular action. And going ahead with resolve, to get to the end despite such odds, calls for cheer. But there is this thing about hassles in life. And I’m confident not many would disagree that these are things we could do away with. When hassles take over every stage of an activity, they start morphing into hurdles so prominent that they are regarded with annoyance and eventually, with trepidation. And that’s when they get a tag of a risk. So, “risk is not all glory, but an unnecessary pain, nobody would lament its absence” is how it comes to be argued. Such a shame! We could really do without hassles. Mind you, the author is not for a moment suggesting that everyone can steer clear of all bother. Unfortunately, the magnitude of efforts is in such proportions that there is bound to be a spot or two here and there. What’s essential (if I may use the word) is it may make sense to show a cold shoulder to occasions which have trouble as a part of the package. Especially, if we already have things going fine and dandy. There’s this bloke the author happens to know, who was apparently in rapport d’amour with a sprightly young lady. Or so the latter believed. From what we saw of her, she is quite an emotional girl, who wears her heart on her sleeve and trusts people a tad too easily. Now, our lad is said to have lived in this idyllic world wherein he would find the lady crafted for him, someday. Not that he dismissed the proposition that lay before him outright, because hope springs eternal in the human breast! Now he would argue he was being a man enough, and almost risk-loving, in giving someone a chance. Fair enough! Just when we thought he was pulling along the yoke of life, along comes this girl who is smart and funny, and projects a firm head on shoulders. And quite chatty when it matters. She takes an instant liking to our man in question, and he doesn’t see anything obviously wrong in it either. A fine situation to be in, eh? And this, the author would agree, is a spot of bother he could have well avoided. Now that the first mentioned is not someone known to be impulsive enough to snap ties for good at the first available cue, he is all but peaceful within. It may appear that he could have traded the trouble for the risk! Well, these are matters of the heart, and it’s agreeably criminal to speak of them in such a fashion.
From the spectrum of humanity we interact with everyday, there are many who would narrate to us how they have things going well for them, and some who say are still yet to see the light at the end of the tunnel. Isn’t it generally the situation that folks who genuinely are thankful for their state of well-being are those who wouldn’t want to face situations that disturb the peace that prevails? If such a chap were to embark on a road trip across the breadth of the sub-continent, he wouldn’t shy away. There are inherent dangers in the very nature of the expedition, but the very thought of reaching the finish line after many grueling days, would be sure to send him into a tizzy. Or another of his ilk may vow to cram up and come out tops in Civil Services entrance, in spite of being employed in enviable capacity. That’s akin to challenging limits and works towards greater objectives. And there are many who believe who have so much to do and have to do so much more to reach the set objectives. It’s just that the end point moves with time, back and forth. Because the distance to the finish line from the point of progress appears to be proportionate to the quantum of hurdles that come in the way of reaching them. (This, the author argues is his line!) He would like to clarify that he doesn’t necessarily mean hurdles in concept, but other overheads – read hassles - which eventually would end up being major concerns. Disentangling oneself from red tape when a chap has it going easy with what he owns, raising Cain over a non-issue that has only grazed someone’s ego, and other phenomena on similar lines. It is apparently a vicious circle and it only widens the deeper one gets into it.
It is an amazing feeling to go about life like it was on a roll, and avoiding anxiety if we could help it. The person, who put pen to paper here, believes it was a big risk that he chose to write on something that he is no expert on, and did it straight from the gut. And argues that he wasn’t hassled one bit when he set about doing it.

-Metafore

ಧಾತ್ರಿ - The Accordion Meets The Harmonioum

A talented team of musicians from Bangalore have come together to meld the best of eastern and western musical traditions. Their latest musical effort with original compositions, is a world's first - a CD compilation of music from the Accordion and the Harmonium.
Having the production and sales support from Amazon.com they are now offering the CD for sale at https://www.createspace.com/1724383.

Do let your musical minded friends know about this CD and post reviews wherever you see fit. That's like applause in the Web space!!

Please also note that the album is available on Amazon:

http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B001J548NA

You could also download as MP3 at the following link:

http://www.amazon.com/Dhatri/dp/B001KR6164

Thanks!